If only the answer to every marital question were as easy as “I do!”
For many couples the challenges of planning their nuptials are a piece of (wedding) cake compared to what comes after: How do we merge our finances—or do we? Do we need to spend every free minute together? And how do we decide where to spend our first Thanksgiving?
Online wedding community TheKnot.com was fielding so many questions like these from their newly married members that they were inspired to create an entirely new site—TheNest.com—dedicated to the unique issues that face people in the first few years of marriage. A 24/7 virtual married-best-friend-who’s-been-there-before, the site and its thousands of just-married members dish out advice on everything from how to get your permanent roommate to pick up his or her dirty socks, to how to inspect a property when you’re buying your first home, to foolproof guidelines for entertaining the in-laws. Unlike single friends (who don’t have the experience to give tried and true advice) or Mom (who has lots of experience but tends to give too much advice), Nesties share their experiences with no strings attached—and free of the worries that come with real-world friendship.
Now the editors of The Nest have brought together the very best of this hard-won knowledge, plus their own astute insights into the early years of marriage, to create a unique resource for navigating the sometimes bumpy road of marriage. Touching on everything from money to sex and starting a family, they go where no etiquette book or self-help manual has gone before, providing real-life solutions for the myriad problems even the happiest couple can encounter when two become one.
The first in a series of books for any couple who wants every day of their new lives together to be as fulfilling and meaningful as the day they walked down the aisle, The Nest Newlywed Handbook goes beyond platitudes and pep talks to explore the many rich rewards of married life.
An offshoot of the hugely popular wedding website The Knot, The Nest started out as an online community of girls grappling with the emotional issues—and enormous to-do lists—that come with the first years of marriage. The Nest has grown into a weekly webzine, a print magazine, and now a book series—all 100% committed to the phrase “happily ever after.” Visit us at thenest.com.
Secrets every couple needs to know, from the website that put marriage on the map
Whether you’re about to tie the knot or are already well into your first years together, you are sure to have realized that this is not your parents’ marriage. Oh, how the rules—and roles—have changed. Who does the housework now that everyone works? If you want to keep your money separate—does it mean you’re not committed? Is it OK to order takeout when the in-laws come for dinner? The Nest Newlywed Handbook is your road map to modern married life, guiding you through the ins and outs of tackling life as a twosome.
Get tips and tricks on:
•Merging your money (or not)
•Building the family fortune
•Loving your in-laws
•Buying your first home
•Decorating as a duo
•Divvying up the chores
•Keeping the flame alive
•Fighting nicely
•Talking about kids
•Maintaining your single friends
•Hosting during the holidays
•Figuring out the future
This book is filled with advice, detailed to-dos, checklists, quizzes, and worksheets that are sure to spark conversations, fix problems, and get your new life together on track and off to a good start.
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这本书的叙事风格极其流畅自然,完全没有那种说教的味道,读起来就像是和一位经验丰富、非常睿智的长辈在客厅里喝着下午茶,娓娓道来他们婚姻中的点点滴滴。作者似乎非常懂得如何平衡“实用建议”与“情感共鸣”,当你读到一些关于财务规划或者家庭事务分配的章节时,它总能巧妙地穿插一些真实的小故事,让你在获取信息的同时,也能被那种夫妻间互相理解、共同成长的过程所打动。我尤其欣赏作者在处理“冲突解决”部分时的细腻,没有给出标准化的“对错”答案,而是提供了一套灵活的沟通框架,这比那些空洞的口号有效得多。读完之后,我感觉自己不是被“指导”了,而是被“赋能”了,心里踏实了许多,知道在遇到那些不可避免的小摩擦时,该如何有建设性地去面对和处理,而不是被情绪牵着鼻子走。
评分这本“新人指南”的封面设计简直让人眼前一亮,那种暖色调的插画,配上那种仿佛手工制作的字体,立刻就给人一种温馨、亲切的感觉。我当时是在书店里无意间翻到的,本来只是随便看看,结果一下子就被这种让人想立刻翻开阅读的氛围给吸引住了。它给人的第一印象就是“这是一本能让人感到安心的工具书”,而不是那种枯燥的、充满术语的说明手册。那种精心挑选的纸张质感,摸起来就很舒服,仿佛作者在告诉你,接下来的阅读体验也会像触摸这封面一样令人愉悦。可以说,光是这本书的外观和触感,就已经成功地把我带入了一个期待满满的阅读旅程。我特别喜欢那种用心制作的感觉,能感受到作者在细节上的打磨,这在如今很多快餐式出版物中是很少见的。它不仅仅是一本书,更像是一份精心准备的礼物,让人对即将踏入的新生活充满了美好的想象和期待。
评分这本书真正让我感到惊艳的地方在于它对“个体差异”的尊重和强调。在很多同类读物中,似乎都在推崇一种“理想的夫妻模型”,但这本书却花了大量篇幅去探讨“如何保持自我”以及“如何庆祝彼此的独特性”。它没有要求新婚夫妇必须磨平棱角,变成一模一样的两个人,反而鼓励双方带着自己完整的过去和独特的爱好走进婚姻。我特别喜欢其中关于“个人空间时间预算”的讨论,这在很多新婚指南中是避而不谈的敏感话题,但作者却直率地指出,高质量的相处来源于高质量的独处。这种深刻的洞察力,让这本书的价值超越了基础的生活技巧,上升到了对健康亲密关系的哲学探讨层面。它让我们明白,爱不是占有,而是互相成就,这种观念的建立比任何具体的家务分配表都来得重要。
评分我必须坦诚,一开始我对市面上所有的新婚书籍都抱有一种深深的怀疑,总觉得它们大多是陈词滥调的集合。然而,这本《巢的新手指南》彻底颠覆了我的看法。它不像是一本由某位权威人士撰写的“标准答案”,更像是一份充满智慧和幽默的“伙伴手册”。作者的文字里有一种罕见的真诚,没有粉饰太平,直面了婚姻中那些光鲜亮丽背后的琐碎和挑战,但同时又充满了积极的解决导向。我发现,这本书的价值在于它提供了一种“心法”,而不是具体的“招式”。它教会我的不是“怎么做”,而是“如何成为”——成为一个更有耐心、更有同理心、更愿意成长的伴侣。这种深层的心理建设,才是对任何一段长久关系而言,最宝贵、最经得起时间考验的财富。
评分不得不提,这本书在结构编排上的匠心独运,简直是教科书级别的示范。它不是按部就班地罗列清单,而是采用了模块化的设计,每一章的内容都像是一个独立但又相互关联的拼图,可以根据自己最需要的部分进行针对性阅读。我发现自己可以轻松地跳跃到那些让我感到最困惑的主题,比如“如何建立共同的家庭愿景”或者“应对双方原生家庭的界限设定”,而不会觉得遗漏了什么重要的前置信息。更妙的是,每结束一个大主题,作者都会设计一些互动性的“反思练习”或者“讨论提示”,这使得这本书立刻从一个被动的阅读材料,变成了一个可以和伴侣一起参与的“项目”。这种主动参与感,极大地增强了内容的吸收率和实践性,让书本上的理论真正落地到了我们的日常互动之中。
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