Prior to gaining primary custody of my three sons in January
1992, I led the single life of a divorced man and enjoyed a
rewarding career. 1 traveled about 70 percent of the time, lived
alone in a nice aparnnent, and accepted my role as a visiting
parent. Regrettably, there were times I lived as far as 1,200
miles away from my children and I wound up spending a for-
tune trying to visit them from Chicago to San Antonio every
four to eight weeks.
After a year of commuting, I transferred to Dallas to be
closer to my children.Three months later my ex-wife asked,
"How would you feel about the boys coming to live with
you?" I immediately, without thinking, said, "Yes!"
Almost as instantly, my mind was floodcd with a bombard-
ment of obstacles I would face if my children lived with inc.
What about my job? How would I travel? Who would care for
the boys when I worked?What about my social life? Would I
be able to provide for nay children? What if the boys didn t like
living with me?
My fears and anxieties grew. I tried to stay optimistic by
focusing on the positive aspects of having custody, like not
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