1 was awakened by a clap of winter thunder， like a tympani<br >roll， ominously heralding the day. I opened my eyes to the<br >gray beginnings of dawn， and as my mind erased a dream， a<br >feeling of dread surged through me. I knew that they would<br >soon come for me. Dread turned to panic， as I sank back<br >against the starched pillowcase， .fighting the nausea.<br > I studied the room: a wooden chair， a worn dresser， a sink<br >in the corner， a window with bars. It was like a prison cell，<br >maybe like the cell that was waiting for me if I failed.<br > Why me? Millions of others would wake today to their<br >usual routines. For me， it was a day of life or death. I wanted<br >to run， or to push open the dull silver windows and fly away.<br >But there was nowhere to run， and the dull silver windows<br >were barred. There was no escape.<br > "Dr. Kelman， Dr. Kelman." The night nurse loomed over<br >the bed. "Time to get up now. You re due in surgery in less<br >than an hour." She looked at me somewhat disdainfully， but l<br >didn t know why till I splashed some water on my face， and<br >looked at rau.q~lf in thp mirror<br >