Chapter 1: Sex, Love And Character

第一 章：性、愛與品德

The people's good is the highest law.

~ Marcus Cicero, 106-43 B.C.

眾人的益處是最高的原則。 ( 西賽羅，西元前 106-43 年 )

How far would you go to do what you know is right? Would you sacrifice something important? Would you risk your life? Would you face being ridiculed and rejected?

當你知道一件事情是正確的時候，你願做到什麼樣的程度？你願為此犧牲一些重要的東西嗎？你願為此冒生命危險嗎？你願為此忍受揶揄或拒絕嗎？

One person who understood the meaning of sacrifice was Norm Cadarette. In 1983 he contracted HIV (the AIDS virus) from a blood transfusion during open heart surgery. He did not find out until 1987 that he was infected.

有一個人懂得犧牲的意義，他的名字叫做 Norm Cadarette 。他在 1983 年的一場心臟手術中，因著輸血的緣故感染瞭 HIV ( 愛滋病毒 ) 。直到 1987 年他纔發現自己受到感染。

Norm knew that no truly safe measures existed to prevent the sexual transmission of HIV and that he could infect his wife, Ginny, with AIDS, as long as they shared sexual intimacy. He loved his wife very much, so he decided to give up having sex with her. Ginny agreed with this decision. She knew that Norm loved her because he was willing to set aside his desire for sex and put her first. After that they remained abstinent. “True love will never put the object of that love at risk,” Norm said.

Norm 知道，並沒有任何真正安全的措施能防止 HIV 透過性行為傳染。隻要他與他的妻子 Ginny 有肉體上的親密關係，就有可能使她感染愛滋病。他深愛著他的妻子，因此他決定放棄與她有性行為的接觸。 Ginny 同意他的決定。她知道， Norm 愛她，並且甘心不顧自己的性慾而將她擺在第一位。自此之後他們保持著禁慾的生活。『真正的愛是絕對不會將所愛的人置於風險之中，』 Norm 說道。

The Cadarettes gave up physical intimacy, but they still enjoyed a happy, fulfilling marriage. Sex had been only one part of their relationship. They were best friends and shared intimately all the things that were in their hearts.

Cadarette 夫婦放棄瞭肉體上的親密行為，卻仍享有快樂、滿足的婚姻生活。性僅僅是他們以往的夫妻關係中的一部份。他們是最好的朋友，並且親密地分享瞭彼此心中所有的點點滴滴。

The Cadarettes learned how true love responds when it confronts a deadly disease. As a family with their daughter, Jennifer, they refused to focus on themselves and HIV. Instead, Norm and Ginny talked with others about their marriage and how they found intimacy by being best friends. They spoke to as many as 150,000 people a year at schools, colleges, churches, camps, and conferences, helping young people discover what true love means.

Cadarette 夫婦認識到，真愛一旦麵臨緻命疾病的威脅時，會做齣什麼樣的反應。身為他們的女兒 Jennifer 的傢人，他們拒絕將焦點放在自己和 HIV 上麵。相對地， Norm 和 Ginny 與其他人談他們的婚姻 ， 以及他們是如何藉著成為彼此最好的朋友得到親密關係。他們每年在學校、大學、教會、營隊以及研討會中 ， 嚮將近 150,000 的人演講，協助年輕人發現真愛的意義究竟為何。

“What kids truly want is someone to share their heart with,” Ginny said, “and to be a deep part of the other person.”

『孩子們真正渴望的，其實是有人能夠與他們分享彼此的心，』 Ginny 說道，『並且成為對方生命中深刻且重要的一部分。』

Norm died on April 5, 1995.

Norm 逝世於 1995 年 4 月 5 日。

Norm Cadarette demonstrated what most people would call good character. When his circumstances demanded it, he knew that the right ting to do and believed so much in it that he actually did something about. He gave up the pleasure of sexual intimacy with his wife to protect her from his deadly disease.

Norm Cadarette 以自身的例子說明瞭，什麼是眾人所謂的 好品德 。當他的處境要求他時，他知道並且堅信該做正確的事，而他也真的做到瞭。他放棄瞭與妻子發生性關係的欲望，為使她免於緻命疾病的威脅 。