Preface Early in my pastoral experience, I discovered that I was failing to help two groups of people through the regular ministries of the church. Their problems were not being solved by the preaching of the Word, commitment to Christ, the filling of the Spirit, prayer, or the Sacraments. I saw one group being driven into futility and loss of confidence in God s power. While they desperately prayed, their prayers about personal problems didn t seem to be answered. They tried every Christian discipline, but with no result. As they played the same old cracked record of their defeats, the needle would get stuck in repetitive emotional patterns. While they kept up the outward observances of praying and paying and professing, they were going deeper and deeper into disillusionment and despair. I saw the other group moving toward phoniness. These people were repressing their inner feelings and denying to themselves that anything was seriously wrong, because "Christians can t have such problems." Instead of facing their problems, they covered them with a veneer of Scripture verses, theological terms, and unrealistic platitudes. The denied problems went underground, only to later reappear in all manner of illnesses, eccentricities, terribly unhappy marriages, and sometimes even in the emotional destruction of their children. During this time of discovery, God showed me that the ordinary ways of ministering would never help some problems. And He began to enable me to open up my own heart to personal self-discovery, and to new depths of healing love through my marriage, my children, and intimate friends. God then led me to enlarge my pastoral ministry to include special care and prayer for damaged emotions and unhealed memories. In the twenty years that I have been preaching, teaching, counseling, and distributing tapes on this subject, I have heard from thousands of formerly defeated Christians who have found release from emotional hangups and who have experienced the healing of crippling memories of the past. In this book, you will meet some of those people. You will read of attitudes and feelings that are familiar to you or to someone dear to you. Any resemblance to real persons is completely intentional. All of the people in this book are very much alive; their stories are used with permission. Names and locations have been changed to protect their confidence. Any resemblance to your life may seem coincidental, but it is also intentional. For most of us have the same needs and longings. I pray that these chapters will be helpful in picturing God s ways of repairing damaged emotions, of recycling hangups into wholeness, and of transforming crippled Christians into healed helpers.
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读完这本书,我的第一反应是,这绝对不是一本速食的心灵鸡汤,它的深度和广度远远超出了我的预期。作者在探讨人类情感的复杂性时,展现出了惊人的洞察力。我发现自己常常停下来,反复阅读某一个段落,因为它精准地描述了我曾经经历过,却无法用语言概括的挣扎瞬间。这本书的结构设计也很有意思,它不是线性的发展,更像是一个不断深入的螺旋,每一次回归主题时,都会带来新的理解层次。我特别喜欢其中关于“接受不完美”的那几章,它没有回避人性的幽暗面,而是将它们温柔地纳入叙事之中,让我们意识到,那些被我们视为“缺陷”的部分,恰恰是构成我们独特性的基石。这种坦诚让我感到非常受用,它打破了社会对“完美情绪状态”的虚假追求。从文学性的角度来看,它的语言韵律感极强,读起来有一种古典的沉稳,让你不得不放慢呼吸,去感受文字带来的重量和质感。
评分坦白讲,我是一个对情绪管理抱有高度戒心的人,因为太多书籍给人的感觉就是一种压抑或否认真实感受。但这一本则完全不同,它真正做到了“直面而非逃避”。作者没有用光鲜亮丽的未来愿景来诱惑读者,而是平静地陪你在阴影里待一会儿,等你准备好了,再一起走向光亮。书中对于“哀悼”过程的描绘尤其震撼,它承认了失去和痛苦的必然性,并将这种承认视为疗愈的起点,而不是障碍。这种对人类存在困境的深刻理解,使得全书的基调充满了人性的温暖和现实的厚重感。阅读过程中,我的思维被不断地激发去追问“为什么”,而不是满足于表面的“是什么”。它教会我的最重要一课是:真正的力量,来自于对自身脆弱性的全然接纳。这本书无疑是一部值得反复阅读的佳作,它不是那种读完就束之高阁的消遣品,更像是一本需要时常翻阅的,关于如何做一个完整的人的“操作手册”。
评分这本书的阅读体验像是一场漫长而宁静的自我发现之旅。它没有提供即时见效的“解药”,因为它深知情绪的根源是错综复杂的。相反,它提供了一套细致的“工具箱”,里面装的不是锤子和钉子,而是放大镜、指南针和一套精密的测量仪器,让你自己去勘测你内心的地形。我尤其欣赏作者在处理“边界感”问题时的犀利和清晰。在人际关系中,我们常常因为模糊的界限而遭受消耗,这本书提供了一套既尊重他人又坚守自我的策略,这种平衡感在同类主题的书籍中是极为罕见的。它的语言风格有一种跨越时代的庄重感,仿佛是阅读一本被时间打磨过的经典著作,每一个句子都经过了深思熟虑的打磨,没有一句废话,却又字字珠玑。我发现自己开始在日常对话中,不自觉地运用书中学到的那些观察视角,这说明它的影响已经深入到我的思维模式之中了。
评分这本书简直是心灵的绿洲,我最近阅读的体验中,很少有哪本书能如此细腻地触及那些深藏在心底的、难以言说的情绪波澜。它没有给我那种生硬的、教条式的“你应该怎么做”的指导,而是以一种近乎诗意的叙述方式,引领读者进入一个自我对话的空间。我尤其欣赏作者处理痛苦和创伤的方式,那种克制却又充满力量的笔触,让人在阅读过程中感到被深深理解,而不是被评判。它更像是一位资深的朋友,坐在你身边,用温和的语气分享着生命中那些微妙的、关于如何与自己和解的故事。书中的一些隐喻和意象构建得非常成功,每一次翻页都像是在解开一个关于自我认知的谜题。我不是一个容易被一本书完全吸引的人,但这本书让我愿意放慢速度,细细品味每一个词语背后的重量。那种感觉就像是,你以为自己已经足够了解自己的内心,但这本书却为你打开了一扇全新的窗户,让你看到了自己从未察觉的风景。读完之后,我感到一种长久以来的紧绷感得到了舒缓,不是那种瞬间的狂喜,而是一种更持久、更平静的内在稳定感。
评分说实话,我本来对这种主题的书抱持着怀疑态度,总觉得它们大多是空泛的口号堆砌。然而,这本书彻底颠覆了我的看法。它最成功的地方在于其叙事的“温度”。作者似乎对人类的脆弱性怀有极大的同理心,这种同理心渗透在每一个案例分析和观点阐述中。书中提到的一些关于“放下过去”的论述,并不是要求我们遗忘,而是引导我们去重新定义过去在我们生命中的角色。我个人深受启发的是,它鼓励读者去关注那些被忽略的微小胜利,而不是总是聚焦于那些巨大的失败。这种视角上的转换是革命性的。我感觉自己不再是那个被情绪洪流裹挟的个体,而是一个有能力去观察、去引导内在河流的航海家。书中的哲学思辨部分,虽然略显深奥,但经过作者巧妙的阐释,变得易于消化,就像是把高深的智慧用日常的语言重新包装了一遍,既有营养又不失亲切感。
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