UNCONDITIONAL PARENTING Moving from Rewards and Pu pdf epub mobi txt 电子书 下载 2025
Alfie Kohn is the author of nine previous books, including Punished by Rewards and The Schools Our Children Deserve, that have helped to shape the thinking of parents and educators across the country and abroad. He lectures widely and lives (actually) with his family in the Boston are and (virtually) at www.alfiekohn.org.
- 育儿
- Parenting
- 英文原版
- 教育
- 心理学
- 教育理念
- Education
- 家庭
Most parenting guides begin with the question "How can we get kids to do what they're told?" and then proceed to offer various techniques for controlling them. In this truly groundbreaking book, nationally respected educator Alfie Kohn begins instead by asking, "What do kids need - and how can we meet those needs?" What follows from that quetion are ideas for working with children rather than doing things to them.
One basic need all children have, Kohn argues, is to be loved unconditionally, to know that they will be accepted even if they screw up or fall short. Yet conventional approaches to parenting such as punishments (including "time-outs"), rewards (including positive reinforcement), and other forms of control teach children that they are loved only when they please us or impress us. Kohn cites a body of powerful, and largely unknown, research detailing the damage caused by leading children to believe they must earn our approval. That's precisely the message children derive from common discipline techniques, even though it's not the message most parents intend to send.
More than just another book about discipline, though, Unconditional Parenting addresses the ways parents think about, feel about, and act with their children. It invites them to question their most basic assumptions about raising kids while offering a wealth of practical strategies for shifting from "doing to" to "working with" parenting - including how to replace praise with the unconditional support that children need to grow into healthy, caring, responsible people. This is an eye-opening, paradigm-shattering book that will reconnect readers to their own best instincts and inspire them to become better parents.
具体描述
读后感
最近看了两本教育方面的书，《阅读的力量》和《无条件养育》。第一本是讲自由、自愿的阅读的好处，拖泥带水的几百页，读完就记得这个结论了。 《无条件养育》倒是在很大程度上与我之前的想法冲突很大。 论坛里面经常有父母讨论如何教育孩子的，“那天终于忍不住揍了他一顿”...
评分想要把孩子养育的好，绝非易事，本书也确实没有给出任何具体的办法。就像作者说的一样，养育孩子没有死的教条的办法，每个小孩都是独立的，个性的。 读前半本书的时候，我一直在问一个问题，如果不能惩罚，不能表扬，那我怎么办，碰到孩子不听话，哭闹，耍脾气的时候，不能这样...
评分有多少父母都举着爱的大旗对孩子的心灵造成创伤和痛苦？有多少家长在不知不觉中把自己自卑，挫败，虚荣和焦虑传染给了孩子？不看这本书，我几乎要忘了自己曾经走过的心路。我知道有时候时间是治愈一切的良药，没人喜欢自揭伤疤重温过去。但其实没有什么过去和未来，当下发...
评分 评分最近看了两本教育方面的书，《阅读的力量》和《无条件养育》。第一本是讲自由、自愿的阅读的好处，拖泥带水的几百页，读完就记得这个结论了。 《无条件养育》倒是在很大程度上与我之前的想法冲突很大。 论坛里面经常有父母讨论如何教育孩子的，“那天终于忍不住揍了他一顿”...
用户评价
车轱辘话翻来倒去的说，真的很佩服老外。不过这个概念我非常接受
评分One of the best parenting books I've ever read. Answered most of my questions regarding discipline. I have changed my old practices and need to revise my previous writings.
评分One of the best parenting books I've ever read. Answered most of my questions regarding discipline. I have changed my old practices and need to revise my previous writings.
评分One of the best parenting books I've ever read. Answered most of my questions regarding discipline. I have changed my old practices and need to revise my previous writings.
评分一，作为父母，无条件地爱孩子，是由于ta是你的孩子，而不是由于ta做了哪些可以让你自豪的事。这种无条件的爱，既不是溺爱，也不是对你的孩子市恩市义（所谓养育之恩，即属市恩市义）。二，做出恰当决定的能力需要从幼年一点点培养、历练，并让孩子了解每一项决定都与责任的承担有关。学习做出恰当决定的途径，恰恰是通过做决定本身，而非通过听从他人指导。三，要有勇气、有能力面对和质疑自己的养育经历以及被养育的经历。是的，人通常不愿意质疑自己、质疑自己亲近的人，尤其是自己父母。但谁都不是完人，包括你和你父母，所以，只要用心，一定会找到可以改进的地方，使自己变得更好并尝试做更好的父母。
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